Author: MICHAEL WARMUTH

Let us consider what it really means to stop being ‘somebody’ – to become completely still and surrender totally. Our alignment with the ego is so habitual, so unconscious, we are rarely aware of the effort we are making, the will that we are using to keep control in place. To become conscious we must be quiet and have no agenda but to become quiet. Consider if there is anything you want to change right now you are choosing control. If there is anything you want to be different right now, you are choosing control.

The ‘you’ that is thinking these thoughts knows nothing of what is best for you or what is right. It will not guide you to truth. It is an act of will that keeps the separation in place. Our ideas, our thoughts, our beliefs, are all designed to keep the separation in place – to keep our will active. We know nothing of what is best for us, of how to know the truth. The only thing – and let us be clear – the only thing we know how to do is to keep the separation going.

Surrender means surrender – complete and total. Not with conditions, not with expectations or any idea of what it should be. Surrender means a total, complete giving up of having it our way. We have heard before that the difference between truth and illusion is absolute – there is no compromise or little bit of truth or little bit of error. It is one or the other.

Most of us do not know how or why we were called to undertake this journey. It is difficult, painful and challenging. There is a reason. There was that within us that recognized the need to be authentic, which recognized the hypocrisy and dishonesty of the ego and longed for clarity and authenticity. There is that within us which recognized the prison of the ego and longed for freedom. Most importantly, there is that within us which has never forgotten what we truly are.

So our journey is inevitable. There are times when we question whether it is worth it, but really there is no choice. Every one of us will make this journey. Let us remember the difficulty is of our own making and we can challenge that choice in every moment. There is no moment we cannot ask ourselves, “Is this really what I want? Do I really want it to be this hard? Do I really want to make things this difficult?” For it is our own choice. We must accept completely that we cannot do things of our own will and be happy. We can simply accept that the only thing we know how to do is to reinforce separation, reinforce our struggle and suffering. If we would accept that the only real choice we have is to surrender our will completely, our journey would be so much easier.

And so that is our practice in this moment, to come to terms with that simple fact that we can do nothing on our own. Eventually we must see that that ‘somebody’ is not real – it never was who or what we are. And then we will align with the truth and our life will be guided completely by the truth. Be aware right now that the only thing holding you back from the freedom, power, love and joy of being aligned with truth is your own decision right now to be in control, to be separate, to do your will – not the will of the authentic truth within you.

Notice what your will wants in this moment. It may claim to want peace but you can be sure it doesn’t. For anything that claims a lack of peace is not real – it does not want peace. Resistance is your will, the will of the identity, the ‘somebody’, the ‘me’. We give that will power; we energize it. Now we can see that we want to withdraw that energy. We want to surrender our will completely – the only way to end separation. So this is our practice. This is our intention – the ending of the separation with the surrender of our will.

It would be hard to exaggerate how much we want to make our decision to be separate work – how much we are trying to prove we can do it our way. On most of the spiritual journey we are trying to find peace in our decision to be separate. Consider how much time you spend trying to fix anything, whether it’s your body, relationships, work, finances, or the world around you. How much time do you spend trying to fix the little problems of life along with the big ones? How often do you think you know the right way to do things, the right way to be? How many things have you got the answers for? What do you spend your day doing? Do you spend it devoted to surrender and to the truth, to revealing the truth within you? Can you remember that this can only be done by complete and total surrender?

Again, it would be hard to exaggerate how hard we are trying to make our separation work and we have included the spiritual journey as part of that effort. This may sound like judgment, like something is wrong, but it is not. This is simply making conscious, bringing to awareness, what is actually happening. For denial is a great skill of the ego, as well as confusion of the facts and truth. The ego pats us on the back for doing good things, doing the right things and knowing the right answers. Our physical life, our life in this body, is the story of our conflict with the truth. We act it out in so many ways. We project out our hatred, guilt and fear and recreate the conflict over and over and over again in the world. For that is what the world exists for. It is created as an escape from the conflict, an effort to get the conflict out of us.

Every disturbance, every emotional reaction, every accident, every coincidence is a projection of our rejection of the truth – of our true selves. The ego will rush in and say that it is being judged, being found wrong and bad, and it will reject what is heard because it does not want us to be conscious, to be aware of all the ways we are denying the truth. The ego was created to prevent being conscious, prevent awareness. When you watch what it does when it hears the truth it is obvious.

So let us see if we understand and make it simple. If there is a problem, a conflict, issue or disturbance, there is only one answer, only one solution. The solution lies in the realization of the truth. It is the answer to everything. We must be clear it is not going to be easy and not going to happen in every moment. Awakening is a process that uses time. There isn’t any reason it should be different right now. We cannot find fault with ourselves. There is no justification for that and we are certainly doing the best that we can. So, once again, these words are not spoken with judgment and condemnation. They are spoken to awaken.

For the most part we are unaware of how unconscious we are – otherwise it wouldn’t be called ‘unconscious’. If we were completely conscious we wouldn’t need these words. At some point we are going to have to give up the idea that we know any answers at all and give in to the realization that there is always only one answer, because there is only one problem – trying to make separation work, trying to make this dream reality. So we can clearly discern the problem if we use our reason and focus on the solution.

Right now what is your state of surrender? What are you aware of in yourself? Are you willing to stop; are you willing to surrender? Are you willing to make that the focus of your awareness right now, to make that your intention? Are you willing to give up being right, looking good, knowing all the answers, and release all that effort so that the truth can be revealed? Are you willing to get out of the way of that which is authentic and real? This is the solution to every problem. Love heals everything. If you can’t find a solution you know that love is missing.

So there is nothing to be done in this moment except surrender. The path of surrender is a bumpy path. Resistance arises. But as we have heard, resistance is simply unwillingness. When resistance arises ask yourself if you want to awaken, do you want truth, are you willing to surrender? Are you willing to allow, to accept, and give up? We accept our resistance because we believe that surrendering to truth is somehow undesirable. Then our resistance has power – power to make us believe that peace and truth are out of our reach. But in reality, what we want is truth, light, love, and peace.

When we are truly willing nothing can stop us from knowing who and what we are. Remember resistance is unwillingness – it’s ‘no’. Is that really what you want to say? Do you really want to say ‘no’ to love? We think we are saying ‘no’ to save ourselves from being judged and condemned, but actually we are saying no to unconditional love, absolute peace and power – complete resolution of all conflict. That is what we say ‘no’ to. You must ask yourself in every moment, “Is this is what I want? What am I saying no to?”

Let us wake up. Let us end the deception that we can make separation work. Let us return to our rightful home. In reality there is no unwillingness to hold us back. There is no judgment coming. That is all projection of the ego. Let us find a way to be loving and gentle with ourselves – forgiving. Then we can surrender to who we truly are.

Do you understand that your physical life – your physical being, experiences, health, security, relationships – are all ways of defending and supporting your separation from truth. When we get sick it proves that we are real. When we are poor or have financial difficulties it proves we are real. It proves that the ego is necessary and right.

It is important to understand the purpose of all that we have created. We continue to prove that we are right to be separate and that separation is real. Let us be clear about what we really are doing. We have projected onto the truth a judgmental, condemning, punishing being – a God to fear. We have truly manifested the need to be God-fearing. It is in our consciousness and has been for so long. That is the source of our sickness and our lack and inability to find peace and happiness. We feel determined to protect our separation out of fear of the condemnation and banishment to nothingness.

We must find within us, that fear, that guilt, for it is the source of our unwillingness to surrender the ego. As we know and have heard many times, the ego is our choice and not our dictator. It has no reality other than the reality we give it. Our greatest hope is that we can realize the truth and keep the ego. We want to spiritualize the ego. Ask yourself plainly, “Do I really want to give up being me? Am I really willing to give up being me? Right now, in this moment am I willing to surrender all that I have believed and thought about myself – all that I have worked so hard to develop in myself? In this moment am I willing to give all that up to become present to what is truly real?”

If you believe you are truly willing, then peace is yours. If peace does not come, your willingness is not complete. If you can feel or sense your unwillingness, that no inside you, ask yourself, “Why am I saying no? What is it about being completely free that I do not want? What is it about the illusion of who I am that I want to cling to so badly?” In whatever form the answer comes to you, rest assured that it is not true. It is based on a false idea of what surrender will bring. It is based on a fear of God, if you like – or a fear of love, a fear of truth, a fear of not being in control. Whatever your reason for saying no, know that it is based on a false idea. You are clinging to the idea of separation out of fear of some catastrophic consequences of surrendering. We must make this conscious; we must get this exposed to the light.

It is not enough to say that we are committed to our path. If we are not willing to take full responsibility for our sense of separation and are clinging to it, we may believe that we are powerless, that we don’t have a choice, and we are a victim of the ego. Let us be clear right here and now that the ego is a choice. We give it power. We give it life. We give it the illusion of reality. So let us revisit this choice once again. Are you willing to completely surrender being ‘me’? If so, then go in peace. If not, look deeper and ask again, “What is the source of my unwillingness, the source of my no? What is the false idea that leads me to believe that clinging to the ego is a good idea?”

Now let us remind ourselves what we are saying no to. What is the truth? What will surrender be? Surrender to truth is not a giving up of our lives, not some kind of loss or sacrifice. Surrendering to the truth is seeing things as they really are – perfect. Surrendering to the truth is dropping all the illusions, all the fear, all the guilt that we have imposed on ourselves. Surrendering to the truth is coming home to love – the true source of our being. It is the experience of unity, oneness, the true knowing and certainty. It is the experience of perfect peace and freedom, the infinite timeless peace. Do you really want to say no to that? Do you really want to deny the only safe harbor there is? Do you not crave peace, the knowing that you are perfectly alright?

What strange idea keeps you opposed to that experience? Rest assured, it is not true whatever it is. You are in no danger from truth, God, or love. No sacrifice is demanded of you. You have nothing to prove. It is already what you are; it is already the truth. It is already within you. Nothing can change that. You are perfectly capable of denying yourself the experience, but is that really what you want? Is being you so much better, so much safer? It is a twisted idea that we are better off with the ego. Search deep within yourself. Why would you say no to the power, freedom and peace of surrender? Remember, the ego cannot speak the truth. Every reason you have to cling to separation is a false idea. You have been misled. You have deceived yourself. You have been convinced to give up your rightful home, but isn’t your rightful home what you really want? If it is what you believe you want, why do you believe separation is better?

Can you imagine how it feels to be truly carefree – to be untouched by worry or anxiety or doubt?  Can you imagine feeling only the peace of knowing “all is well” right now?  Consider that it is your birthright to feel such peace, to know you are completely safe and secure, to be light and carefree. But there is a catch – the ego will never experience that and as much as you believe you are working to be free of the ego, it is only the ego that is working.   That which is real and true within you does not need to be freed of the ego – it is already real and true, already authentically peaceful.  We cannot overestimate the degree to which we are trying to spiritualize the ego.  It is insidious in its ability to make us forget that it is not real, that we are not it. 

Think about this.  You are asked to imagine being carefree.  It is most likely that you are trying to imagine the ego being carefree.  You are thinking of yourself as your ego.  You are thinking “you” with a small y.  Freedom, being free from anxiety and worry and doubt, is not possible for what you think is ‘you’.  For here is the key to knowing truth.  If you believe you are separated from the truth you can’t know it or you don’t know it.  If you believe you are not free, if you don’t feel carefree, then you are saying “no” to the truth.  You are saying “yes” to spiritualizing the ego.  Perhaps you are working earnestly at being spiritual but that which is not spiritual cannot be made spiritual because that which is not spiritual does not exist.  

To make spiritual is an oxymoron.  Spiritual is and can never be anything but what it is already right now.  Anything that claims to want to be spiritual is not real.  Anything that claims to be separated and apart is not real.  So everything new that claims to be anything but perfect peace is not real.  Consider more closely for the moment how much you have invested in doing your spiritual work.  Not that it has been irrelevant or a waste of time, but look at what you have been trying to do.  

We know we need to let go, to stop this fight but how can we stop?  How can we stop when we have so much faith in the ego?  We act as if, and believe, it has power; we constantly proclaim its power over us.  We talk about it as if it was an enemy – not something of our own making, our own dreaming.  It is just another way to keep control.  If we are engaged in a battle with the ego we do not have to surrender.  And so it goes on and on.  

We must come to recognize that this self with a small s is truly who we think we are.  We think this self is choosing to fight the ego.  We think we can make this self become spiritual – we will train and discipline it.  Can you see the insanity of this idea?  The true Self with a capital S has no need of our assistance.  Nothing has happened to it.  There is nothing wrong.  

The purpose of this discussion is that we may see the ridiculous quest of trying to become spiritual.  This may sound like a judgment or harsh criticism, but it is in fact a statement of the truth.  And it is not to be expected that we should already know this, that somehow we have failed because we did not already recognize this truth.  It is a journey that everyone must make.  

We must become absolutely clear that what is not perfect peace cannot be real, cannot be fixed and cannot be made spiritual.  It is to be recognized by what it is:  an idea that we have clung to in desperation for so long that we don’t know how to let it go.  A person clinging in terror to an object will never realize they are better off letting go until they try.  And until they have freed their mind of the idea of clinging as the only answer – once they are open the possibility of another answer – then other possibilities can arise.  

So here is our task – to continually examine and challenge our belief about what is real right now, particularly in terms of who and what we are.  There is only one truth, one reality and that truth is unmistakable, undeniable – it is known to us and we recognize it instantly.  It knows only peace and perfection.  We cannot accept anything else as real.  

Finding stillness within is a skill that is basic to the spiritual journey, and yet in many cultures there is no knowledge or acknowledgement of the importance of being able to quiet the mind.  We have become accustomed to the constant noise of our mind, so much so that we are afraid to be alone in silence.  We seek distraction constantly.  In order to make room for the truth we must cultivate our own comfort in silence.  From the viewpoint of the ego that looks like doing nothing, just wasting time.  But our spiritual search will be fruitless if we cannot guide ourselves to the quiet and still mind. 

Take this moment now to consider how often you really practice this journey – how often do you sit in silence and stillness with no distraction?  Try it now.  Turn your attention inward. Let all thoughts, plans and activities drop away.  In worldly terms it takes time to become quiet, although in reality it happens in an instant – in a timeless moment. 

All the knowledge in the world is of no use when it comes to this important step.  Except in one way, in reassuring ourselves that in fact this is what we want and it is safe.  We have resisted it and resistance to this step is the fundamental basis of our suffering and struggle.  Our decision to turn away from our authentic selves results in fear of the silence and stillness within. 

So we know we cannot judge ourselves, we cannot find fault with our resistance, and we can remember that more than anything we long for what lies within us already.  It is already there and already true.  So we use our knowledge to guide and reassure ourselves that we are safe – we can make this journey and indeed it is what we want.  We will experience fear, we will be distracted, we will start to pay attention to our thoughts, but let us be calm and accepting, not judgmental and anxious.  We can allow ourselves to be guided, to be called. 

The fear, resistance and distractions are simply the fragments of the wall we built and we can let them drop and return to the nothingness that they are.  They have no reality.  There is only one thing that is real.  We can call it what we want – it has no name.  It is universal, infinite, and eternal.  When we allow ourselves to know it, it is the only thing we know.  So there is nothing more important to be done than to find the silence and the stillness.  That is our practice.  That is our journey. 

Do not listen to the arguments of the ego that claim it is too hard, there’s too much resistance.  Those are simply noisy thoughts.  Don’t look at them anymore.  Look deeper, further.  Listen to the call of truth – it is always there.  Do not be deceived.  You can let go of your defensiveness now.  There is no need to fight any longer.  Peace is within you right now.  Give in. 

It is not difficult to understand how we become discouraged or frustrated in our spiritual journey for we have an unrealistic expectation.  We think that we can bring all the qualities of the ego with us to our meeting with God.  We think we can bring judgment, good and bad, right and wrong.  We think we can bring our belief in the world and sickness and health, rich and poor.  Those very things are the source of our disappointment and frustration.  In this moment, are you completely accepting ‘what is’ as it is, as it comes right now?  Be relentless in your questioning of what you are bringing to this moment – what judgment, what expectation, what rules?  In what way are you saying to yourself right now that things should be different?

We may have the idea that if  we work hard enough, are good enough and diligent enough, that we will meet God and our problems will all be solved.  But that is the ego’s approach to problem solving; that is how the ego gets things done.  We are not going to be made different by our meeting with God – we have to be different to meet God.  This sounds as if we are being blamed, but in reality we are exposing our choice.  There is no blame and nothing wrong.  That’s the key to the truth of the matter:  in this moment, if we claim there is something wrong, we are choosing to separate ourselves from the truth.  The truth is there is nothing wrong.  The insistence or proclamation that there is something wrong is an alignment with the ego, but it feels like something is wrong.  We are suffering, we are experiencing pain, symptoms or emotional turbulence – that must be wrong!  We are supposed to be free, joyous, and happy!

What we don’t see is that we are making it that way and we cannot judge or find fault with that.  We cannot align ourselves with the thinking processes of the ego – the beliefs in the worldly effects.  We cannot judge ourselves for believing them because that which believes in the ego is the ego.  We are being deceived by ourselves.  We are being told there is something wrong and we are believing it.  We are being told that we are not good enough and we are going along with it.  We are told there is something wrong and we go along with it.

In this moment we can stop all that noise and say, No, there is nothing wrong.  No matter what appears to be true, only truth can be true.  No matter what this noise in my head is telling me, it is not true.  It can’t be because we know the qualities of truth, we know what is real.  There cannot be something wrong.  We cannot be bad.  We cannot be unworthy.

Those are not qualities of truth but why are we choosing to believe them?  The fact that we must face is that we want them to be true.  Some part within us believes that we should suffer, that suffering is a way to live.  There is something within us that chooses to proclaim suffering and struggle as reality, not truth.

We must be very diligent for this is not a matter of blame or finding fault – all judgment must be suspended.  We have suffered pain and loss.  We are afraid to suffer pain and loss again and we have been convinced that by living and proclaiming the truth we will suffer great pain and loss.  That is what we believe.  We must find that within us which believes in that pain and loss, for that is the source of our choice.  Something inside us is hurt so badly that it cannot bear to be exposed to that which it was separated from.

When somebody hurts us deeply, often our choice is to never see them again.  And that is why we avoid the truth.  For meeting the truth means looking squarely in the face of being hurt so deeply.  We cannot blame ourselves.  We cannot judge ourselves.  We can only be compassionate and accepting.  It is frightening.  It feels terrible, but if we do not make it conscious we are controlled by it.

We can see that when we find ourselves in the depths of resistance we can ask ourselves, What is it I don’t want to see right now?  What is it I don’t want to know, for I am choosing to suffer rather than know and see what is real?  That is my choice right now in this moment.  

We must be cognizant of the fact that the ego is extremely intelligent and clever in the ways that will distract us from remembering the source of our difficulty.  It learns as we learn because it is our own invention.  We endow it.  We give it power and life so that we do not have to face that which we do not want to.  In the depths of our resistance, misery and despair, we feel alone and unable to shift.

This is when we must pray – pray for help.  For prayer is opening ourselves again to the idea that there is something other than suffering and struggle – reminding ourselves that God is real, turning away from what appears to be real towards reality.  We are not asking for an outside source to help us, we are asking ourselves to reconnect to what is real.  It takes great presence of mind to remember what is real in the depths of resistance, but it can be done.  For no matter how real it seems, that which is not God cannot last and is not real.  It has no reality – only the reality we give it as we accept and believe in it.  It is only when we give it life and power that it seems to be real.  As soon as we withdraw that life and power and turn to face the truth, then it is no longer real.

In this moment, we can pray, we can seek to align ourselves with truth, peace and acceptance.  We can say, I know that despite all that appears to be real in this moment, there is something else that is really true.  I know I seem to want to believe in suffering and struggle, I seem to think I deserve it and am not worthy of anything else.  I have many thoughts in this moment that don’t reflect the truth.  I know it seems that I am powerless to change this and I know that this mind cannot solve this problem.  It is the mind of God that I seek – the mind of truth, the universal and absolute, not the temporary.  These thoughts of unworthiness, aloneness and separation are a fantasy created to protect me from the truth.  But I do not need protection from the truth.  There is nothing to fear in truth.  There is nothing to be lost.   So I seek the truth – the mind of God, the mind that is my mind, the universal mind.  It is not the fantasy that I have created, but the eternal and permanent truth of God.  I know it is real and is here in this moment.  It is the source of my being right now.  It is the only thing there is right now.  Everything else is just a crazy activity of my imagination.  I seek the sacred and holy within me, which is beyond doubt the only thing within me.  Let there be no mistake, I cannot replace God with my mind.  It is only a trick of the ego.  Let me proclaim only that which is true and deny that which is not and cannot be real.  Let me rest and abide in truth, for that is reality.  That is ‘what is’.  I do not need protection.  I am protection.  That is the truth. 

We have become accustomed to the idea that we seek spiritual freedom, and that it is what we want, but somehow there are forces against us.  Even if, on an intellectual level, we acknowledge that those forces must be within us, we still displace them by calling them the ‘ego’ or something else.  So we can never really take full responsibility for what is going on within us.

We know that we are busy using our minds to create a reality that isn’t truly real.  We understand that there is a deeper reality that is always true and real and is the source of our life.  And we long for the freedom, joy, and peace of living in that truth – but why is it so difficult to find?

We must remember that this thing called the ego is not a separate force, is not the devil, and not a power against us – it is of our own making, carrying out our demands and our commands.  It is our mind at work.  We have given it the task that we claim we no longer want it to do, and yet we continue to empower it.  It seems impossible to believe that we could turn it off in a moment.  It has no life of its own – only the life that we give it.  It has no reality of its own – only what we imagine for it.  We talk about the ego as if it is separate only because it is not real.  But it does indeed keep our attention distracted from reality, for that is the job we give it in every moment.

How are we to reconcile our longing for truth and peace and our constant construction of barriers to it?  There is that within us that has not been soothed and reassured enough to trust that everything will be okay if it relinquishes what seems like its only form of protection.  And the truth is that we find that part of ourselves very distasteful.  We see it as weak, as vulnerable.  We judge it.  We do not want it exposed and so we often undertake our spiritual journey the same way we have done everything – by sheer will.  We are going to overcome our resistance by sheer effort and make it go away.

What we find, which seems to deepen our struggle, is that our contrast between happiness and suffering grows deeper as we are determined to find peace and yet keep control.  We think that the spiritual journey is only about finding peace at the cost of everything else.  But really there is the journey of getting to know every aspect of ourselves, becoming at peace with every aspect of ourselves, becoming free to be whatever we are in any moment without judgment.  This is the greater journey.

Who would not feel good about themselves if they were at peace all the time?  That is the way we see it.  But who would feel good about themselves when they see those parts of themselves they have kept hidden in the dark – those parts of themselves that are capable of much darker feelings and thoughts?  It is impossible to find spiritual peace while keeping aspects of ourselves hidden.  In fact, truth is much easier to find than that which we do not want revealed.

Of course our longing for peace is authentic.  Of course we want peace.   But we must understand that it is the ego – that make believe world – that tells us we don’t have it and must continue to seek it, keeping us entirely distracted from the plain and simple truth that we are hiding something.  How else can we explain the effort we put in, the hours of study, practice and meditation, only to find ourselves back in the resistance?  This is no call for judgment, blame or shame.  It is a call to reality, a call to truth, authenticity and honesty.

We say we want to be free and yet we resist it.  How can we reconcile these two seemingly opposed ideas?  There is one simple answer.  There must be something about ourselves that we really do not like.  We say that letting go is hard, surrender is difficult, but coming face to face with that within us which has led us on a path of loathing and misery is more difficult than any task.  There will be nothing to let go of once we have accepted the truth.

So here we are in this moment, desperate for peace, and yet apparently blocked by something barely even recognized to be true.  What are we to do?  Our effort has not been in vain; our practice has not been a waste – far from it.  We have learned to accept, to release judgment, to question our thoughts and beliefs.  We have learned and experienced surrender and letting go.  The truth is that we have come a long way.  And now the truth is that we are a moment away from peace.  That moment of self-awareness where we realize there is nothing within us to hide, nothing to protect.

It sounds frightening that there is something within us that we are so afraid of.  But in reality it is nothing.  It’s an idea, a thought, a belief system.  It has no substance, no reality whatsoever.  But we must be conscious of our fear, our efforts to keep this aspect of ourselves hidden.  For it is the basis of the ego, the purpose of the ego.  We cannot blame the ego for doing the job its been given.  We have to look at the job its been given and realize it is not needed anymore.  We can face that and be free.

And so, in this moment, we must acknowledge the shortcomings of the efforts of the ego, which is the mind that we use when we believe we are anything but at peace.  We must come to peace at this moment just as it is.  We must choose to allow ‘what is’ to be for if we are resisting ‘what is’ we cannot experience the truth – we cannot allow that which is true to be revealed when we are fighting ‘what is’.  Our resistance, our struggle, and our suffering are all efforts to resist ‘what is’.  Give in to it.  Let it take you over, whatever is alive within you right now.  Just give in to it.  Trust, for in fact there is only one thing that is real.  If we come to complete acceptance and allowing, that’s what will be revealed.  That is our journey.

Imagine if one day you found out that you had been switched at birth and that the family and background you came from was not where you belonged.  You found out that your rightful inheritance was beyond all your expectations of possibilities for you.  Everything you thought was true about where you came from, your heritage, your ancestors, was all wrong and was never true – that nothing about you was true.  Imagine the shock to your system to find that your name was not true and your family was not yours.  Everything that you had created in your mind because of what you thought was your family story was not true.  It would not be easy to accept.  Part of you would insist, “that was my family that raised me and I belonged to them.”  To find out such a thing was not true would be disorienting and would shake your worldview.  The things you thought you knew would be questionable.  And yet, that is the truth about you in another way.

When you say, I am, what are you referring to?  For most of us, the automatic reaction to I am is that we are the person who has the story of where we came from, how we grew up, what we have been doing, and where we live.  Yet none of that is who we are.  Consider who you are referring to when you say I am.  Ask yourself now, who am I?  If you meet someone on the street and they ask you who you are, what do you say?  Consider the list of things that you would tell somebody, where you’re from, where you live, what you do, what church you go to, what school you went to.

Can you imagine if somebody asks you who you are and you answer by saying nobody and meaning it?   The story is what has to be released.  The idea that who you are is somebody.  You may be hoping that you will find enlightenment before you have to give that up – before you have to live and be nobody.  That is what keeps you being somebody – the unwillingness, fear, and reluctance of being nobody.  We are not somebody because it was forced on us by some external force.  We are somebody because we would rather be somebody than nobody.  We never give up the idea that we will make this somebody something that works, something that is successful, peaceful, or good at something.  The truly strange, bizarre, and sad thing is that we are nobody no matter how much faith we invest in being somebody and it is never true or real.  It is only happening in our mind – its not happening in some world where we are living a life of being somebody.  It is a dream.  We are already nobody and always have been and always will be.  Nobody means no body.  What we are has nothing to do with our body.  Who we are exists in timelessness and infinity – eternity.  These are not qualities of the body.  There is no space and no location.

We will come to see that the world is a dream, a product of our imagination, created in the mind.  The physical reality is an idea happening in consciousness.  Consciousness is not happening in the world.  The world is happening in consciousness.  In consciousness there is no time or space.  The world has been one momentary idea just like when we dream and can live for days, months, weeks or years, but we wake up after being asleep for only an hour.

The physical reality is a dream.  But who is the dreamer?  It is not your body.  It is not consciousness.  Who is dreaming the world?  It is the mind that believes in separation.  It is the mind that has created duality, and believes it is alone.  It is the mind that has willfully separated itself believing in its own existence as a separate entity.  It is the mind that has not awakened, that is asleep.  The mind does not want to open its eyes and find that the world it has created is not real.  In its separation it has come to believe that its world is preferable to reality.  It is addicted to the reality cloaking distractions of its world.

We can see the lengths the mind will go to to insist the world is real, to insist that we are ‘somebody’.  And yet it is apparent that we aren’t.  To be ‘nobody’ carries is a negative connotation – ‘no body’ means death and ‘nobody’ means insignificant.  The mind that creates the world cannot grasp a world where there is no such thing as significance, no such thing as death, no such thing as time and space.

We cannot leave the decision of what is real up to this mind.  It only knows what is not real – not what is real.  We ask what other mind is there – I only know this mind?  The answer is that there is only One mind.  Everything happens in that One mind.  Everything is of and in that One mind.  There is nothing outside of it.  That’s impossible because there is no ‘outside’ of it.  There is no time.  We are already of that One mind.  We always were and always will be.  We cannot bring that One mind into our dream.  The One mind knows nothing of time and space. We can bring our dream to the One mind where it is revealed for what it is – nothing.  How do we bring the dream to the One mind?  We do it when we see the dream for what it is.  We see how we have been distracted and misled by our own ideas.  When we become clear in our own minds that we are not somebody, that this world is not reality, and our thoughts, beliefs and ideas are not the truth – and we are willing to accept there is only One mind, only one truth – then we are free.

 

As we know, the greatest source of stress is our belief, faith and trust in our identity and conditioned mind. Particularly in challenging times we become more entrenched in the idea that we are ‘somebody’: we have responsibilities and obligations; we are treated unfairly; we have problems. The identity is then strengthened. It is nearly impossible for the conditioned mind to conceive that the identity is not real, that this thing we call ‘me’ or ‘I’ is not real. Nevertheless that is the simple truth.

Consider all the things you think about you. What are your obligations, responsibilities, failures, and inadequacies in this moment? Now consider this question: where do they live? In what part of your body are they to be found? Where do they exist? Where do any of the ideas that you have about who you are exist? Of course they can’t be found; they are just thoughts, ideas – patterns of mental activity. So what can be found that is true about you? There is one thing that is certainly true; you are aware, you are conscious, you hear these questions, you can reflect on them. Something in you thinks. Something within you can answer questions. But what is that? Where is that found? Something in you is aware of many things in this moment. Something in you is listening, looking, and feeling. Is that the same as what you call ‘you’?

Take the time to notice that that which is observing and aware is also observing and aware of those thoughts but it is not the source of those thoughts. Something observes when you say, “I have too much responsibility”. Something observes when you say, “I failed”, but it is untouched by your sense of failure, your despair, your level of responsibility. The one thing we can confidently state is true about ourselves is that we are conscious. We know that we are conscious because we experience it right now. We are aware.

If someone you have never met walked into the room right now and examined you closely without any input from you, what could they know about you? Where could they find all the things that you call ‘you’? Even if they could open your brain and look in it they would not find anything that they could say you thought ‘you’ were. None of it exists in reality. There is a body, there is a mind, an activity of intelligence, a consciousness.

How can we come to accept and experience the truth? We must recognize the illusion of all sense of identity. We must strip away everything until the only thing that is left is that which is incontrovertably true – that about which there can be no argument, no disagreement. What can be proven to be true in this moment? You can say, “I am a failure and I am inadequate” but you cannot prove that to me. You cannot make that true. You cannot make me see that as indisputable truth.

So what is absolutely, unconditionally true right now? Consciousness. Consciousness is here right now. The only thing that remains absolutely true in this moment that would strip away all ideas, thoughts, and beliefs is consciousness. We are conscious. We can hear ourselves think. We can call it awareness – we are aware of consciousness. We are aware of many things. Our conscious mind is receiving all kinds of information but there is that within us which is observing even that.

So we can see without a doubt that this moment is real. What are the qualities of this moment? When we fully pay attention to only this moment we realize that it never ends and it never began. This is the only moment there is. When we truly engage our consciousness and awareness fully in this moment we can experience the truth of unity. In this moment, the moment can be neither bad or good, right or wrong – it is just what it is. The only thing that is true about me in this moment is that I AM: I AM not something; I AM not somebody; I AM. There is nothing else. Everything emerges from I AM. Everything is made new in this moment.

We are accustomed to think that the spiritual experience is something rarified and just out of reach most of the time, something that is somehow higher and better. It’s the nature of the human mind to calculate, compare, analyze, contrast – it looks for difference; higher and lower, bigger and smaller, less and more. When we use the mind in our spiritual practice and study we apply those comparisons to ourselves as well as to others and life. We think the spiritual experience is higher and better. But in reality we know that can’t be true. The simple truth is that nothing can be better or worse, lower or higher, bad or good.

The spiritual experience is actually more ordinary than non-spiritual experience. In other words, the spiritual experience is the basis of life, the source of life, the experience of life – it is life. What we call life is just an idea in our minds and has no basis in reality. We see life as suffering, struggle, hard work, pain and loss, up and down, big and small, better and worse. And yet, that which is the source of life, all of life, knows no such ideas.

It does not make us better people to be spiritual. It does not mean we have failed or not. It does not mean we are good, wrong, bad or right. But it certainly impacts the quality of our experience, not as a good or bad thing, but the quality of depth and richness. It is important to understand that being spiritual is not better and being non-spiritual is not worse. We use that judgment against ourselves.

The identity has learned very well how good it makes us feel about ourselves to say we are spiritual seekers. There is hope that we will be better and our life will be better if we are spiritual enough. But it is inevitable when something is good, something must be bad. So we judge ourselves, failing to meet that good standard. It is happening in every moment, the judgment of failing to meet the standards of high spirituality, good spirituality. And this is how we stay distracted.

For at the same time we are so obsessed about the spiritual search or our spiritual betterment, the simple truth is that all that is true is true in this moment. Nothing has changed from the beginning of time in terms of what is true and what isn’t. Nothing has changed since before the beginning of time. Truth remains the same; it is absolute, timeless, spaceless – it is everything.

It is a good idea for us to give up becoming spiritual, being spiritual, and just be what we are. We are already a perfect expression of perfect power, of a perfect source. Our true spiritual journey is to come to complete agreement with that statement. So that we may then let go of our need for control, judgment, duality, and simply trust and enjoy what is already real, what is truly authentic. In this moment right now, we can choose to believe the universe can be trusted. There is nothing but a perfect power, perfect unity.

We can accept that we have been conditioned and acculturated to the point that to trust in a bigger power is a bigger task, but its not impossible. This is not a moral process. It has nothing to do with good or bad, right or wrong – it is simply a state of being that is connected with reality. We are not going to make the world perfect; it already is. We are not going to make ourselves better; we are already perfect. We don’t think that and don’t believe that on many levels; that does not matter. Don’t fight it – accept it. It’s only temporary. It can only last as long as we allow it to.

The creative power of the universe is at work in you, through you, around you. It is the only power there is. Everything else we think is true is simply a thought – it’s not a power, it’s not reality. You can allow yourself to become present in this moment to what is truly real and stop the judgment, the effort, the resistance, and just pay attention to this moment. We are so afraid if we give up our control it will be the end in some way, as if we were making the world happen right now.

The intelligence that is creating this world right now is far greater than ours, so how can we insist that we know what is best? We only know what is best to keep ourselves scared and in control. We don’t seem to know what’s best to live a creative, flourishing, nourishing life. At least its so it appears. The more we open, give up and trust, the more the greater intelligence guides us. We can feel that in this moment. We can experience the presence of that supreme intelligence and love. It is here right now.